A Sudden Ending • Slow Granny Square Blanket Project

I am in a bit of shock as I write this blog post. It has taken a few days. Well to be honest, a few weeks for it to sink in. And to process. It all sounds quite dramatic doesn’t it?

But my Slow Granny Square Blanket Project has come to an end.

The Slow Granny Square Blanket Project now completed

And I just can’t believe it. Because I already miss it. I wasn't ready for the ending of the blanket just yet.

You see I thought the big bag of yarn would last at least a year.

Just 5 granny squares a week needed to make the blanket

Well I still have a lot of coloured yarn left over. It’s the white yarn that has finished. And it did come as a shock.

At the beginning of the year, when I was planning the Slow Granny Blanket Project, I eyeballed the bag of yarn and thought it would definitely last a year of making.

And that ladies and gentlemen is my biggest problem just there. I eyeball everything. Everything I do in my life is done with eyeball measurements. I do not weigh, measure or calculate anything(except for recipes, as I am a really lousy cook) I just look and say “yep, that should be alright”. Honestly my whole life reflects this, but that’s another story in itself.

I loved each week taking time to work and reflect on my granny square blanket

Now in hindsight when I look at the photo of the original blanket I can (kind of) see how I would not have enough of the white yarn. 

So, a few weeks ago when I delved into my yarn bag as I was happily blissed out making my granny squares, I kept looking for the white yarn. Where was all the white yarn? I looked everywhere. I even checked to see if it had fallen out of the bag.

And then my heart sank as I realised. There is actually no more white yarn. Why was I so upset at this?

The Original blanket, many years on after alot of love it began to develop holes

You see I’m not ready to give up the square making. Because I absolutely love making my 5 granny squares a week. The squares are just made for me. For no other purpose than to soothe me.

And I have to admit. It was a way in which I felt connected to mum. She had unravelled the original blanket and wound the yarn into so many balls by hand. And it was like my special time to spend with her as I created. You can read all about the origin of the Slow Granny Square Blanket here.

And to be honest, I tried to match up the white yarn with more white yarn from another, older blanket. But no matter how many ways I moved it in the sun, the white yarns were two completely different colours.

All the yarn woven by my mum, she even tucking in the ends.

So I’ve had to realise that the slow granny blanket project has come to an end. As I said it has taken me a while to process this, especially with it coming to the end of our year in the Bay House. I was just not ready for more endings, just yet.

I’ve come to realise that this blanket was so important in all of the emotional transitions that I have had this year. Creating each square gave me something to focus on, something that I could control. Each square finished represented one more day that I was able to 'get through'. It was achievable.

Making each square was very therapeutic

But really when I think about it, it's kind of okay that the ending of the blanket is now. With the few weeks tossing up about publishing my thoughts and feelings about this blanket, I can see how this blanket will always represent a special time in my life, life at the Bay. My (very annoying, I know) transition to a slow living life. I never thought that I would ever experience a slow living life. But somehow I did. And my slow granny square blanket is the physical representation of it.

And I’ve also realised that I want to make another blanket. As I've started to pack up our life here in the Bay house I have come across another blanket which the family once loved and it has some holes.

The next granny square blanket to be unwoven, this time by me

This time I’m going to wind all the yarn balls myself. But I know that mum will be happy watching this process. Mum will know that I finally feel calm, secure and worthy, everything that I have been searching for this year.

I'll let you know when I get started...I think that it will be once we move to the Beach house. It is true, when one door closes, another opens and you will always find enough yarn.

Remember to do something just for yourself today ~ you are important,

Melissa